You are not good enough. I'm sorry to tell you that.
This world has gotten so used to speaking self-worth and instilling self-confidence that we have a society full of egomaniacs, the church certainly not excluded.
As I scrub dishes, scrapping dried cheese from another plate I am overwhelmingly aware of this truth: I am not good enough. The deeply felt significance of this stings my eyes with tears.
I am reminded of it every day when I hear the sound of my voice, so unfamiliar in its tone. I know I am not good enough when I struggle keeping my cool through breakfast.
The words of a Christian writer and singer come to mind. Heard on the radio she sincerely proclaimed that we are worthy. She said, “Jesus loves us because we are worthy. The Bible tells us this.” Or something along those lines. I understand her sentiment but it rubs coarsely against my soul.
I am not sure where the Bible tells us that we are worthy of Christ. But I do know lots of verses and stories that resound the fact that we are NOT worthy. Yes, “for God so loved the world…” but not because any of us earned it.
I understand this woman’s intention but quickly recognize the fault in her theology…or perhaps just her execution. I’m sure if I’m ever interviewed on the radio I will be a huge puddle of mess slipping like a newborn horse over my words. But after years of walking a believer’s walk – filled with refining moments intended to sand down my rough spots and reveal my weaknesses – and just over four years of being a mommy, I know what she said is not true. And perhaps is leading many people astray.
Here’s the truth:
“For while we were still weak, at the right time Christ died for the ungodly. For one will scarcely die for a righteous person—though perhaps for a good person one would dare even to die— but God shows his love for us in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us.” Romans 5:6-8 (emphasis mine).
I want to hold her hand, all the hands of the women and girls who hurt and have hurt and who will hurt, and tell them her “you are not good enough. And that’s the miracle in it all.”
You are not good enough for His love, but He loves you anyway.
You are not worthy of His attention, but He sings over you anyway.
You are not capable of returning His extravagant affection, and He will stay with you anyway.
He did not die for you because you were worthy of His sacrifice. You aren’t. You, and I, and all the rest of us are riddled with holes of imperfection. We are selfish and arrogant and cruel. We are all like the little girl at the park who told my big girl, “I don’t like you.”
We are all that person.
We are all Judas.
But we don’t see it. Or we don’t want to see it. We’d rather tell each other phrases that sound buttery soft but lack in their truth. We encourage each other with “you are worthy… you are good enough.”
Yes, I get what she was trying to say. I say it too. My friend circle is made up of some super women who, in my eyes, truly are worthy, deserve the very best, and are good enough. Women of such strength that I count myself among the truly lucky ones to be able to call them friends and mentors. And, in truth, if God calls us to a role (mom, caregiver, teacher, leader…) He will equip us for the task. But inherently, we are nothing. We are nothing apart from Christ bestowing upon us His undeserved and unfathomably extravagant affection.
If you want to walk in confidence without fear, the best place to find your footing is in this: you are chosen.
YOU ARE CHOSEN.
YOU ARE CHOSEN.
Not because you did anything to earn it. You are simply chosen because God wanted to love you. Nope, He doesn’t even need to love you (although He is love), but He wants to love you. The Creator and Master and King wants to love you!
If that doesn’t give you freedom to walk this life with your head held high, I don’t know what could.
Another singer comes to mind. And the words of her familiar song are a reflection of my heart. I can turn off the tap and wipe dry the counters with this truth ringing.
“My worth is not in what I own
Our truest significance is in the eyes of our Savior. Our identity is in whose we are, not who we are. The world would rather us embrace our individualism and our independence. And we would love to self-identify with whatever brings us comfort for the moment. But the only identity that matters is whether we are in Christ or apart from Him.
My inherent identity tells me I am a mess. I am a sinner. I am a mom who struggles every day. But my God-given identity tells me that I am a woman called by the Holy Spirit to the loving arms of my Savior because of the power of my Heavenly Father. I am not worthy of it. I am not good enough for it. But I am chosen.
I am not saying that we are unworthy. I am saying that the source of our worth is not in our self but in our Savior. And, honestly, I’d much rather have Him hold my worth in His nail pierced hands than have to hold on to it myself. My value is fixed. I cannot change it, increase it, or diminish it. I am worth His blood because He loved me. I am clean. I am redeemed. I am adopted into the family of God. I am chosen.
I AM CHOSEN!
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